THE MONAGAMI TIMES
Sunday, June 1, 2019
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The Sunday Book Supplement
The Monagami Times Best-seller List!
ALL ABARD by Sir Rodney Wanker. (review by Stephanie Boulder) When I first picked up my copy of Sir Rodney’s sure-handed auto-biography, I didn’t really know what to expect. Certainly, Sir Wanker has been a main-stay of the Monagami cultural scene for over seven decades, and, of course, in that time, you would expect that he would have a had a mountain of experiences and anecdotes related to his time on stage both here and abroad. But, surprisingly, that aspect of his life is relegated to only one page and that is basically his resume. From his time as artistic director of the Golden Lung Theatre here in Monagami, to his ill-fated attempt to relocate to New York city, to ‘break into the big time’ at the age of 65. Mind you, that was only last year and the horrific response to his performance of the title role in the Margaux Hemingway Story: She Did It His Way, sent him scurrying quickly back to the safety of the Golden Lung. (Much to our great delight!) No, this book is almost entirely devoted to his little-known or understood beloved hobby of cracker-stacking. You would think that everything that could be written on this subject would already be out there in books like Margaret Atwood’s Ritz vs Carr’s: How to Stack Like a Pro or Michael Ondaatje’s My Father is Crackers. But Sir Rodney’s massive 500-page tribute to the ‘sport’ leaves the others in the dust. At times irreverent and cheeky, he never fails to push the envelope in this clever and mesmerizing tale of a life surrounded by biscuits. Run, don’t walk, to the Mucktown Book Nook and get your copy soon! **** $42 Signed.
ILLUSTRATED MEN'S BOOK OF LETTERS by Bruce Hunter, David Huband & Adrian Truss (review by Clive Biggles) It was only a few short weeks ago that the Book of Letters hit the market and believe me when I say ‘hit’ it did just that. Hit, I mean. This work published on Lulu.com is probably the funniest book I have ever read. And I was on the Stephen Leacock Award Jury when the Rob Ford Diaries arrived. And now it has shot to #2 on the Times Best-seller list. Can #1 be far away? I think not. Their deadly skewering of everyday politics, cultural figures and life in places such as Russia and Guam is not to be missed and they hit the mark repeatedly while eviscerating the news makers that we have all come to hate as well as the little people like you and me that we're fairly indifferent to. I particularly enjoyed the ‘stream’ (as they call it) on Russia’s Vladimir Putin, a sad comic victim on this wild ride, who is substituted for by a group of conspirators and then killed off with hilarious results. Written in the form of letters, emails and other forms of person-to-person communication, the book is accompanied by dozens of hilarious graphics and illustrations. Buy this book! **** $25 at Lulu.com
MOUSE OF THE HOUSE by Dick Withers (review by Susan Tippler) Dick Withers has seen enough misery in his life. He was a Sgt. in the Molestshire Police force for 17 years, and the depravity of human society eventually drove him into retirement. But, while he has been retired as a police officer, Mr. Withers certainly has not shied away from the spotlight of everyday terror. He has crafted a perfect horror novel, although this tale is extremely graphic in its depiction of the assaults on humanity. Withers has taken a simple situation, and turned it on its head. Marvin Mouse is the head of a large family of mice living in a grassy, snow-covered field. Every day, Marvin tries to leave his home and go to work, but a dark force, the size of a skyscraper is lurking outside. It is known simply as “The Cat”. And this cat is extremely deadly. Fourteen of Marvin’s children get mauled and eaten. And that’s in one day. Using his skill set, his intelligence, and his other children as shields, Marvin battles external and internal demons. The metaphor of using a family of mice fighting a larger dark force of nature invokes America’s current political climate, so much so, that another neighborhood cat is simply called “Big Orange”, an obvious reference to U.S. President Donald Trump. Will Marvin succeed? Or will his family get crushed in a battle of tabbies? Withers writes in a style that can best be described as “police reporting with a horror edge to it”. I simply couldn’t put it down. Brilliant! $22 at Random House
TARGET: EASTER ISLAND by Pvt.Tommy Tucker (review by Cupper Taylor) When my editor threw this across my desk, I protested that I didn’t really want to review a book written by a 12-year-old vet of a war, that only played as a political charade in our more uncertain times. The invasion on Easter Island never happened and maybe Canada would never achieve that victory under the leadership of primeless minister Stephan Harpoon. Who would care about the adventure of a quickly thrown-together unit of ill-trained children? My trepidation quickly melted away when I read this boy’s account of those dangerous and uncertain times. His depiction of waiting among the other children, never knowing when they might be sent to their death, was deeply moving. The book had humour with his stories of his dog Dunky’s incontinence and brother’s final burping contest. But this book was also philosophical in his questions on who's better, Batman or RuPaul?. This boy was not just a soldier, he was a boy soldier, a Canadian boy soldier human being, who’s possibly gay. But no matter, what was most interesting about the book for me was his detailed accounts of his mother and her many “friends” who would stay over. Pvt Tucker clearly had an ear for detail and the ability to convey these vivid accounts. His notes from Operation Mommy are some of the best reading I’ve done in a long time. Although the spelling is atrocious. I would recommend this book to anyone who is a parent, a bachelor or a renovator. $4.99 at Blameless Press.
THE THING WITH NINE HEADS by Penelope Mushman (review by Slim Jiblets) Perhaps it may seem a bit old-fashioned, the type of Sci-Fi that Penelope Mushman is emulating in her new book, the Thing with Nine Heads, but underneath this stereo-typical trope is what the book really is… a cutting-edge, political thriller set in Washington DC. Russian FBI agent Boris Zatsanuff infiltrates the White House presidential staff, posing as a sycophant, like all the other sycophants. But he is, in fact, preparing a dossier on the Machiavellian plotting of the president and his confidants. It is only by sheer accident that Zatsanuff stumbles on the terrifying secret of the back rooms… The president, the vice-president, the chief of staff and the attorney general are but four of the nine hideous heads belonging to one gigantic, glowing, blob of evil that lies buried beneath the Rose Garden. Sent from a universe bent on the destruction of the human race, The Thing with Nine Heads is on the verge of completing its dreadful mission when it is discovered. Don’t want to be the spoiler here, but let’s just say that when the Democratic speaker of the house, Nancy Pelosi, finally learns about this strange creature it is already too late. Half the country has known about the Thing for two years and readily supports it nonetheless! Pitiful earthlings who can save you now? Written with style and panache, this book is just aching to go to the beach with a bottle of wine and a joint. $35 Penguin Books.